The Last Shot

Risking your wrath I am begging a favor. Please “untag” the last photo on Facebook. It erases the real you and leaves a blurred version.

For you, this photo may hold memories of wonderful times with friends. For me it only causes worry and sadness.

I can visualize you: bright eyes, tender mouth and clearly defined face reflecting intelligence and radiating good will; the posture of strength and capability, if not always confidence.

This photo shows unfocused eyes and a camera-ready smile in a smudged faced. It exhibits a slight passivity that troubles me. You don’t look buzzed, you look drunk.

Judging from my own past experience, your sparkling memories precede this photo. Your happiest times will have been before you crossed over into the wavy lines of warped thoughts, slowed reactions and unsteadiness. The most fun would have been when you and your friends were witty and quick with understanding and response, when you were giddy with the hilarity of clever conversation and the carefree silliness of youth.

Once having gone too far the good times become submerged in misunderstandings, in petty disagreements, in betrayals, and sometimes in semi-conscious actions that end in regret and self-loathing. Thoughtless words float back to live inside your head. The ties of friendships are frayed. Romance dies in the banal reality of nights that are too long and too familiar.

These are my memories evoked by your photo. They may not mirror your own.

But I am afraid for you. I want more for you. Delete that blurred image and reclaim your true self. I love you.

xxoo

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