Years…and Years…

Dear Husband,

I don’t write to you often.  Do you feel as if our children and grandchildren take priority?  I hope not.  It’s just that you have heard everything I have to say. LOL

How could we ever have imagined the long path we have followed?  Even were it possible for young people to project into the future, I know that we weren’t old enough, smart enough and certainly not mature enough to have thought much beyond our first apartment.

Now, of course, it’s called living in the moment.  Then, our families called it, “Not having a Plan”.

So now I want to thank you for sharing so many  moments with me.  You know my history because you lived it with me.   We have suffered hardships and enjoyed great luxuries. We have been companions through life and death.

You have always been my rock.  You are steady, dependable and strong.  And there is nothing that you won’t do.  From changing diapers to crawling under houses, you have stepped up to any and every physical necessity.  How do you do that?  How do you clean up after puppies, sick children and aging parents; all with the same equanimity?  How did you face the overdue bills and the cougar in the driveway with such courage?

I am strong in many ways.  I have mental and spiritual courage.  Yet you are the one who faces the night-time frights from noises and bumps  and the 3:00 a.m. phone calls.

You have been my greatest teacher.  Why not? I’ve spent more time with you than any other person.  And we share more differences than similarities.  I have learned from our differences.

You have taught me that love is not always expressed in words.

I have learned (not very well) patience and tolerance.  I have learned tenacity.  I have learned to value diversity.  I have learned to be wrong and to be right without the necessity of pain and humiliation.  I have learned to be dependent and you’ve taught me that I must be independent.  I have learned to respect and to demand respect.

And together with you I have learned that love is deep and abiding.  Not always a warm glow.  Sometimes a gritting of the teeth and determination to encompass.  Sometimes passion and sometimes comfort.  Many times disagreement and almost always compromise.  Love is everything.

You have given me wonderful gifts throughout the years.  I love the sentimentality that surrounds your choices.   And I must grant you the position of “first” giver.  My anniversary present has always been waiting for me when I wake up, while I’m always scurrying around town to have yours ready by the time we have dinner together.    This morning (last night) was no different.  While my gift for you is still in the back seat of the car, a card was on my pillow when I came to bed.

Happy Anniversary.



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