On my way to a nephew’s wedding celebration today. Thinking of these connections I am reprinting this post from 2009.
“And did you get what
you wanted from this life, even so?
And what did you want?
To call myself beloved, to feel myself
beloved on the earth.” Raymond Carver
I had a wonderful visit yesterday. My niece and grandniece came by. We chatted, we laughed, we cried and we loved.
It reinforced how important family connections are to me. A string of history holds us loosely together in a common bond. The wonder of it all is that the string can be picked up in a moment. It can dangle, unnoticed, like a gossamer web in the corner of the room and then gently entangle us as we come near. No matter how tangled it gives definition to our past and future.
I love my nieces and nephews and their children, met and unmet. I would love it if I could hold them each in my arms for an hour or a day. They are the living memory of my sisters who are gone. They are a link back to earlier years for my husband and I. And they have become distinctly themselves in ways I can observe but can scarcely comprehend. They are the testament that life goes along in its diverse and winding path.
My relationship with the younger generation turned a bit on its axis yesterday. Is it age? Is it maturity? Is it that ubiquitous circle of life? In all of the years of being the “Aunt”, it has been vastly important that I send my love to them. There have been times when I did that well, and other times not so well.
Now, in some subtle way, their love is supporting me. I know that they are beloved. I know that I am beloved.