‘Twas the night before Christmas and all the through the house, not a creature was stirring…
…except for my gerbil mind racing on it’s circular track.
Well, that’s not exactly true. I have spent a restful night, just not a deep-sleeping night. And I’m thinking that wakefulness on the night before Christmas is a legacy of having had children. Even when everyone is living on their own and miles away; my body is geared for the primal memory of assembling toys, finishing the handmade gifts, wrapping and counting to make sure everything is perfect.
There is none of that this year. Our Christmas is Merry and Bright and Uneventful. I’m feeling that Peace and Goodwill.
So I’m not missing you this Christmas. I know it’s a bit strange, but as in all of the years since you began leaving home, I’m happy if you are happy. Oh sure, I see or hear things I would like to share with you. I’d love to be “in” on the special moments of your lives. Yet I am truly content to know that you and your children have the comfort and joy of being together.
I understand that time and space do not separate us from the love we have for each other. We are a family, whether in parts or as a whole. And you know that my love follows you wherever you go. I have or will have talked with each and every one of you. And I can easily imagine your individual families celebrating in little pods of joy. Each home is filled with love. What more could I want for you?
I’ll hear about your presents. Eventually I’ll know whether you went cross-country skiing or took a walk to visit friends down the street. Maybe you are listening to Christmas carols and the kids are playing video games. Some of you are watching the waves on the beach. I am content to wait for the stories.
All is well in my little world. The bread is rising on the counter top.
So I think I’ll climb back into bed and wait for the sugarplums to dance. Maybe they’ll lull the gerbil into sleep.
I do love your letters. Thank you and merry Christmas.
Thank you, Rising. I suppose yours has passed by now… I hope it went as easily as a “first” can be.