Unfortunately there can be no doubt that man is, on the whole, less good than he imagines himself or wants to be. Everyone carries a shadow… Carl Jung Psychology and ReligionI’ve heard about the shadow in the last half of my life but I have only recently begun to do some work. I have known that looking through the lens of Enneagram Seven I see the bright side. But I didn’t realize how much I was blinded by the light.
A man who is unconscious of himself acts in a blind, instinctive way and is in addition fooled by all the illusions that arise when he sees everything that he is not conscious of in himself coming to meet him from outside as projections upon his neighbour. Carl Jung, The Philosophical Tree
Strangely enough, I have at times glimpsed my Shadow and come to some conclusions on my own. For instance, I have realized that if someone really irritated me or if I judged them harshly, I was probably judging some aspect of myself that I didn’t like. But, I am usually well into triangulation, irritation, and self- justification before I recognize the signs.
Now I am learning more:
How in stating ‘my truth’ I can seem very forceful – thus interpreted as a certainty of ‘the truth’ that everyone should believe.
How fear of my own vulnerability can be read as disdain for that of others. Actually, on my dark days I can openly criticize. Especially if I consider my own issues to be ignored (and more important).
That dreading my own weakness I can unknowingly try to manipulate others into feeling they should shore me up. My quest for independence can supersede any consideration for those around me.
Oh, Lordy, Lordy! May I please return to the light and revisit this in small doses? It’s cold here in the shadow.
XXOO
A Letter to my Children 