Father’s Day is Here Again

To the Family Fathers… I come from a tradition of involved fathers. It was my dad who sat huddled in a chair by my bed when my sore throats or earaches kept me awake at night. (Read more here.) It was my husband who went to the baby who cried in the night. As each […]

Graduation 2020 – Leap!

  Congratulations, my dear Grandson. I think often about our conversation in January when you expressed your feelings about your coming graduation. Comme ci, comme ça. You were glad to have everyone gathering in celebration, but the event itself dd not seem important to you. Interesting how life turns us around, things that seem not […]

Your Day is Here!

Congratulations, Years of hard work and you come away with the grand prize –  a degree and a job! Kudos to you! And even though you are focused and dedicated, I know it hasn’t all been easy. You have worked hard and studied hard. You have proven yourself more than worthy of all you have […]

Starring….”Mother”

My most important role in life has been “Mother”.  I took on the role with some false assumptions and no realistic script. Not even an audition. Getting the part was much simpler than other occupations I later tried. There was no training, no exam, not even routine practice questions. That’s why I call it a […]

Date Night Disclosure

Comparison is the thief of joy. Theodore Roosevelt Even at the ages of 77 and 80 my husband and I try to have a date night. I love music, we love wine, and he loves me – so we do what I want. I find live music at a winery on a Friday evening, we […]

To My Valentine

To My Valentine, I have so many valentines now. But as I am thinking about my children and my grandchildren, my mind turns to you. You are the one, after all. You are the one who has always loved me. All of those years ago I didn’t understand how such a stud decided to pay […]

Christmas means to me…

It’s really no wonder that I have some ambivalent feelings around Christmas. I grew up without a secular tradition. Until I was a teenager, all of my Christmas memories were centered around church services. We sang a lot of hymns about the birth of Jesus but I never heard “Here Comes Santa Claus” except on […]

Wait – Think – Live

I wish I could show you…the astonishing light of your own being. Hafiz I am writing to you – my children and grandchildren – but also children and grandchildren everywhere. Life is fragile and ends quickly and often capriciously. Two people we know and love have died by suicide recently. One, a young man in […]

Letting Go

Who hurt you, once, so far beyond repair that you would meet each overture with curling lip? While we, who knew you well, your friends, (the focus of your scorn) could see your courage in the face of fear, your wit, and thoughtfulness, and will remember you with something close to love. Marylyn Plessner Maybe […]

A Generation Between

I wrote this many years ago…and it is still so true. Dear Children, It comes down to the difference between parenting and grandparenting. Without blaming myself as a parent, I understand the difficulties of parenting: showing love versus giving guidance; giving direction without giving orders; teaching values without imposing ideology. When you were born I […]