To My Valentine

To My Valentine, I have so many valentines now. But as I am thinking about my children and my grandchildren, my mind turns to you. You are the one, after all. You are the one who has always loved me. All of those years ago I didn’t understand how such a stud decided to pay […]

Christmas means to me…

It’s really no wonder that I have some ambivalent feelings around Christmas. I grew up without a secular tradition. Until I was a teenager, all of my Christmas memories were centered around church services. We sang a lot of hymns about the birth of Jesus but I never heard “Here Comes Santa Claus” except on […]

Wait – Think – Live

I wish I could show you…the astonishing light of your own being. Hafiz I am writing to you – my children and grandchildren – but also children and grandchildren everywhere. Life is fragile and ends quickly and often capriciously. Two people we know and love have died by suicide recently. One, a young man in […]

Letting Go

Who hurt you, once, so far beyond repair that you would meet each overture with curling lip? While we, who knew you well, your friends, (the focus of your scorn) could see your courage in the face of fear, your wit, and thoughtfulness, and will remember you with something close to love. Marylyn Plessner Maybe […]

A Generation Between

I wrote this many years ago…and it is still so true. Dear Children, It comes down to the difference between parenting and grandparenting. Without blaming myself as a parent, I understand the difficulties of parenting: showing love versus giving guidance; giving direction without giving orders; teaching values without imposing ideology. When you were born I […]

Muy Raro…y ahora se fue!

Herb was a huge part of my life. His death closes the door to the past but has opened the floodgate for many memories to rush in. I visited him a few times in his last weeks. Beneath the memory loss and extreme illness he was himself. He had a spark that I remembered. I […]

A Blessing of Mothers

Reprinted from May 7, 2016 I’m the lucky one. I have had mothering and mentoring from at least four wonderful women. They mutually excelled one another in the gifts they have given me. When I read my past post about  Mother, I feel as if I have said most of it.  I learned to appreciate […]

Young People Who Lost Their Lives (A partial list)

Emantic “EJ” Fitzgerald Bradford Jr., 21; Jemel Roberson, 26;       DeAndre Ballard, 23; Botham Shem Jean, 26;         Antwon Rose Jr., 17; Ramarley Graham, 18;        Trayvon Martin, 17; Wendell Allen, 20;       Kendrec McDade, 19; Jonathan Ferrell, 24;       Jordan Baker, 26; Victor White lll, 22;        John Crawford lll, 22; Michael Brown, 18;          Ezell Ford, […]

St. Valentine’s Day

We have St. Valentine to thank for a lot. On the commercial side, this day has created all sorts of reasons to fall short, to spend money, to be disappointed, etc. On the bright side, it is a beautiful excuse to convey love to the people in our lives. How shall I choose a Valentine? […]

The Birthday

I acknowledge the loss… I wrote this in 2012. I wish I could say it was a unique occurrence or even the last of its kind. But alas… I am trying to do my part in understanding and eradicating racism. But then again, what is my part? It’s hard to know and recognize my own […]