On the Water Again

Rowing was the coolest and most unlikely thing I did in my 60’s. I surprised myself by loving it. To the chagrin of my coach i was often swept away by the stillness of the lake in the early mornings or the beauty of the mist shrouding the mountains. My focus didn’t make me a […]

Getting Real…kinda…

I think I understand the Slough of Despond.* I have cried more in the last month than I have in the last seven months. My feelings are close to the surface. My fear is a jagged edge. It seems ridiculous. I have a prescription for a new physical therapist. He has great expectations for the […]

Live Your Life

Montana Hiker Dies of Suicide Shortly After His Girlfriend Perishes in Avalanche       My love, I’m in a quandary as a grandmother. Above all, I want you to live.  I want you to live fully and joyfully. From the perspective of age, I want to remind you how important your life is – no […]

A Sad Day

So we just keep doing the work… We keep fighting for the voices of those who would be silenced. We stand for marginalized communities. We speak out against oppression and violence and bullying. We make room for peace and kindness; for all faiths and sexualities and colors and genders. We remember to nurture each other […]

On the Day You Were Born

On the day you were born the round planet Earth turned toward your morning sky, whirling past darkness, spanning the night into light. On the Day you Were Born, Debra Frasier I can almost transport myself to that day…the anticipation, the pain, the joy, and the instant alarm that never completely obliterated the joy. In […]

Thoughts on Death

For what is it to die but to stand naked in the wind and to melt into the sun? And what is it to cease breathing, but to free the breath from its restless tides, that it may rise and expand and seek God unencumbered? Kahlil Gibran Dear Friend. You are face-to-face with the death […]

Alone vs. Lonely

Being alone is a privilege and a curse.  Alone can turn to lonely in the time it takes for dusk to move into a room. Still, I have that inner urge for blocks of freedom, which I create by traveling to foreign countries.  And then, when I am away from my own home, I have […]

On Accepting Myself

Dear Sister, I struggle with this concept and I think you do, too.   Accepting ourselves has never been easy for either of us. Oprah has been telling us for years that we are perfect the way we are.  And like all of the rest of us, I think she is still convincing herself.  And […]

Holding On

I’m not living in the present.  I’m not living in gratitude. I know, because  this morning I awoke with grief and anxiety.  Having categorized and cataloged everything in my life that might worry me or cause unrest, my thoughts continually returned to my sisters.  And I wonder at the fear that can contaminate the most […]

Suicide

Dear Son, My heart is aching for you. I can feel your exhaustion as you struggle to make sense of your friend’s death.   I imagine your grief and confusion. For those of us who hold vigorously to life, it’s impossible to understand.  Why couldn’t he see his life clearly?  Why didn’t he work on his […]