The Grandparent Thing

“There were no mirrors in my Nana’s house/no mirrors in my Nana’s house/So the beauty that I saw in everything/the beauty in everything/was in her eyes/like the rising of the sun. I only knew love and I never knew hate.” Ysaye M. Barnwell What was my model for grandparenting? Interesting question! Thinking back to when […]

…on Being Your Mother

Dear Child of Mine, Life changed in the moment you were born.  My thoughts and feelings swirled around the room.  Like a life force they poured from my heart and head, swooshing about and resting on you as I held you in my arms.   Instantly you were wrapped in a warm blanket of love and […]

My Mother, My Life

Dear Mother. I wish I had understood you better in our years together. I’ve had a lot of time now to come to see you from my own perspective as a mother and as a daughter. A mother who is a bundle of unresolved complexities is never easy. Our culture glorifies that woman who is […]

My Mother’s Birthday

Dear Children, Here it is – Mom’s birthday again. Will I ever get better at expressing my feelings about my mother?  I know that the longer I live, the more I understand both her and myself. Observing her difficulty in making connection is an object lesson in love. In the years when you were under […]

Naming Names

My husband often repeats a family catch-phrase, “Call me anything but late for dinner”. I guess I can go with that. I am who I am no matter what I am called.  Although I have been touchy about some things. I don’t like people shortening my name to Lynn. My sister-in-law is the only one […]

Memories and Perceived Value

Red clover may not have been a big part of my life, but it made a big impression. I still experience a frisson of excitement when I see it at the side of the road. It’s a matter of perceived value. My mother paid us about a nickel a bag to collect the blossoms. That […]

What do you REALLY think, Mother?

NOTE: For those of you looking for Mother’s Day Letters, just check under form letters or press the tag for “Mother’s Day”. I’ve never quite grasped the true meaning of Mother’s Day.  Although it’s an interesting concept. Is it like Labor Day…but a day off for Mothers? Is it a training ground for young children, […]

The Mother Line

Dear Kids, Today is my Mom’s birthday.* She’s been on my mind a lot lately and so I’ve been thinking about mothering. Parenting is a bit of a continuum although it may be a winding path. After all, we want to change things that our parents did. We want to do better. We want to […]

A Visit to the Present

This past weekend my dad’s 98-year-old wife taught me a valuable lesson.  She didn’t say anything new.  It wasn’t earthshaking information.  Simply an unforgettable object lesson. I love this woman. And she loves me…when she remembers who I am.  The times when it all falls into place, she is excited to see me.  She holds […]

Don’t be like me…

Hi Kids. I’ve had a repeat “Aha” moment this week. When I listened to Christine Northrup on PBS a few years ago, she commented on the patterns we learn from our parents…specifically from our mothers.  Paraphrasing, she said that it is very difficult to change our patterns of aging from those our own mother has […]