Being Enough

“If my aim is to prove that I am ‘enough’ the project goes on to infinity – because the battle was already lost on the day I conceded the issue was debatable.” Nathaniel Branden in The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem. Of course, I haven’t finished the book because it got me thinking… about the difference between […]

Examining My Strength

What a revelation. I have always considered myself to be very strong.  Physically, yes, but mentally and spiritually, also.  I can do it!  I can take it!  I’ll handle it. A teacher shocked me by questioning the authenticity of this.   Does my strong stance stem more from my desire to be perfect and to […]

Date Night Disclosure

Comparison is the thief of joy. Theodore Roosevelt Even at the ages of 77 and 80 my husband and I try to have a date night. I love music, we love wine, and he loves me – so we do what I want. I find live music at a winery on a Friday evening, we […]

Dodging and Darting

My granddaughter and I have talked about the difficulty of holding on to ourselves in relationships.  I don’t think this phenomenon is restricted to women, but I know much more about it from my own angle. In my younger years I lost myself religiously and sometimes consciously. I believed that it was my job to […]

Shame on Me

I’m one of those “Self-Improvement Junkies” from way back. I’m constantly examining my behavior. Perhaps that’s an entirely different post, but I’ve been thinking about shame. Shame gets a bad rap. Sure, for those of us who secretly hug it to our bosom, it damages us and eats away at our self-worth.  But c’mon, folks, […]

Oh, the places you’ll go….*

Dear Son, That was a strange way for me to respond to your good news, wasn’t it?  I was being kind of silly and it didn’t come out well. Because it sounded as if I subscribe to the belief that who we are is defined by where we live.  And I don’t think I believe […]

My Heart and You

Sometimes I want to wrap you up and hold you safe in my heart. Because when you make mistakes, you seem to see those mistakes as defining you. Because I look at you and see an amazing woman, and you talk about yourself as if you aren’t enough. Because you deserve the best that life […]